Another aspect of The Secrets is gen­er­a­tional con­flict and res­o­lu­tion. This is most obvi­ous in the bat­tle between Naomi and her father, Rabbi Hess. Not only does her father see Naomi as rash in her desire to break with tra­di­tion and forgo the arranged mar­riage, he also feels she does not under­stand his role within the fam­ily, or the true role of his departed wife. Naomi says very lit­tle about her mother, but makes a pow­er­ful insin­u­a­tion that Rabbi Hess treated her badly and caused her great pain. We don’t know how she died, but it’s clear from Naomi’s com­ment about her weep­ing in the kitchen that she was not happy. Rabbi Hess appeared not to know this. The exten­sion of roles moves beyond fam­ily bar­ri­ers and extends far into the ultra-​​orthodox world. Avi Nesher makes the rabbi more com­plex, and a bit more sym­pa­thetic, by por­tray­ing him as at least will­ing to teach his daugh­ter and let her go to sem­i­nary. He is not com­pletely opposed to his bril­liant daughter’s dreams. But he has his lim­its. Perfectly rea­son­able from his point of view. Not so much from Naomi’s.

Another con­flict flares briefly between Naomi and the head­mistress of the sem­i­nary. While a fem­i­nist in her own right — she hopes to edu­cate the first female ortho­dox rab­bis — she fails to fight patri­ar­chal pres­sures and defend Naomi and Michel. Naomi sees that as cow­ardice. The head­mistress sees that as strat­egy. She has the long view, being older. Naomi wants progress now, every­thing depends upon it. She’s young. It’s under­stand­able. In a sense, her future depends upon it, and there’s prob­a­bly much more of it ahead of her than behind her. It’s doubt­ful the head­mistress sees her own future in that light.

A third gen­er­a­tional con­flict has a twist. Naomi and Michel, the young stu­dents, teach Anouk, the much older woman, to cleanse her past, to find peace, to heal. Roles are reversed and reversed again, as Anouk sees the two young stu­dents as daugh­ters, as teach­ers, as guides through the waters of self-​​forgiveness. Naomi no longer has a mother of her own, and Michel seems detached from her own fam­ily. Anouk is both daugh­ter and mother, test case and wounded patient. Circling back …


*     *     *     *     *

Time. The sense of time as we age. The sense of how impor­tant some things are for the present, now. Even if they can be post­poned, or should be, or if they need care­ful atten­tion instead and can’t be rushed. So often the young are in a hurry, and don’t under­stand the slow­ness of ear­lier gen­er­a­tions. So often those ear­lier gen­er­a­tions don’t under­stand why the young won’t slow down, smell the roses, dwell. Stay. Thinking about the gen­er­a­tional con­flicts in The Secrets made me think about a truly bril­liant song by Cat Stevens, Father and Son. So basic, so sim­ple on the sur­face, but evoca­tive of an ancient dynamic out­side of time …


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